Film Review: The Cabin In The Woods

The Cabin in The Woods -You think you know the story.

I actually I don't. Well, I mean I didn't when went I went to Ultra Culture's advanced screening for The Cabin In The Woods a few weeks back.

It's hard to write a review for a film like this without massively spoiling it for any readers (yes, I know people read this blog...mainly Russians!).  So here's the basic jist:

Five college students - Dana (Kristen Connolly), Jules (Anna Hutchinson), Holden (Jesse Williams), Curt aka Thor (Chris Hemsworth) and Shaggy..er, I mean Marty (Fran Kranz) - go of to a cabin (apparently it's in the woods!) for a nice retreat. All is well until they venture down the basement and start meddling with a hoard of artefacts that were conveniently arranged there. When Dana starts reading a diary of a girl that allegedly lived in the cabin decades ago, she inadvertently awakens the entire deceased family who set out to kill those damn meddling kids!

So the kids haul ass into the Mystery Machine and try to get the hell out of there. But the powers that be just won't make it that easy for the poor buggers. And it becomes evidently clear that, regarding the terror they face, there's more than meets the eye (cue Transformers intro).

Who needs Thor and his mighty hammer Mjolnir when you have Shaggy and his mighty coffee-flask/bong/bat?

I must say, I quite liked the casting of this film. Whenever I see a horror film there's usually someone I want to die - usually it's warranted by the fact that their screaming is too high-pitched or that they're utterly useless and therefore they would the world an ounce of good if they just ceased to exist. But this time round I wanted everyone (cue Gary Oldman in Leon) to escape!

It seems everyone is saying how The Cabin In The Woods is a game-changer and breaking all the conventions, or at least trying to. I honestly don't know who started this whole "horror-genre conventions" nonsense but it's really starting to piss me off. I want a list of the conventions, typed out in Arial 12pt with double line spacing, messaged to me so that I can study it and then perhaps take an ACCA/CIMA-esque exam on all the horror conventions so that I can become fully qualified to comment on it. Then I can tell all the nay-sayers to shut up.

The only thing that The Cabin In The Woods is trying to to be is different and I certainly found it entertaining (and so far one of the better films of the year). This game-changing nonsense (and comparisons to video games included) is getting wholly tiresome, as is the whole horror genre itself at the moment. Drew Goddard and Joss Whedon are just trying to give the genre a little adrenaline shot.

I do wish that the film had been released shortly after it was made in 2009. Horror films aren't as popular, nor as central to modern culture as their 90's counterparts were to their time. Scream broke the norms because horror films were the norm in the 90s. But in 2012 the horror genre is very mixed and not as repetitive. Sure, you have endless sequels now to Paranormal Activity and Saw but those two stand alone in their own right and are not even comparable. Had it been released in 2009 it would have probably gone head-to-head with Sam Raimi's Drag Me To Hell, and then would have probably earned more gravitas for being a "game-changer" so to speak. Maybe The Cabin In The Woods is to the horror genre as The Artist is to old Hollywood - a beautiful homage?

By all means I encourage you to see The Cabin In The Woods. Even if you loathe the horror genre I'm sure you'll find some aspects of the film highly entertaining. Plus, if you're reading my blog I doubt you have anything better to do.

Film Review: The Pirates! In An Adventure With Scientists

My plan to see The Hunger Games was scuppered two weeks back when a friend politely film-blocked me (i.e. she told me that she would prefer that I see the film with her, instead of without). Since I dare not refuse her request (she is not someone I would like to upset for fear of physical abuse that may come my way), I was left with really one option at that time - The Pirates! In An Adventure With Scientists.

The Aardman Animations adaption of the book series by Gideon Defoe is set around The Captain Pirate (voiced by Hugh Grant) and his motley crew of mismatched pirates. His ambition for many years has been to win the coveted Pirate of the Year Award - which is determined by the size of one's booty.  I'm refering to their treasure, not their tush. Sadly for the Pirate Captain, his pales in comparison to that of Peg-Leg Hastings (Lenny Henry), Cutlass Liz (Salma Hayek) and arch-rival Black Bellamy (Jeremy Piven).

Possibly the only time I've ever found Hugh Grant remotely attractive

His ego heavily bruised by their sucess causes his no.2, Pirate with a scarf (Martin Freeman), to motivate him to loot some ships so that he can claim what he desires so much. After a string of failures, the crew chance upon a science ship featuring Charles Darwin (David Tennant). Darwin notices that the ship's beloved parrot is indeed a Dodo, making it worthy discovery to present to the Royal Society, which would hopefully result in riches galore thus earning Pirate of the Year. Problem is the event takes place in London, home to Queen Victoria (Imelda Staunton) - who royally loathes pirates!

It's been 12 years since I last saw the first Aardman feature film, Chicken Run, in cinemas. To cater to the modern generation, and to probably makes things a bit easier for the animation studio, they have again used CGI (first use was in 2006's Flushed Away). Nonetheless, the stop-motion animation is what takes centre stage here. Recent children's films are now dominated with computer animation productions, save for Studio Ghibli productions and Disney's return to 2D with The Princess and the Frog in 2009. So it was really heart-warming for me to see that stop-motion animation can still hold its own in the market today.

The film is voiced by some of the most well know British actors. I must say I was a little thrown off to find Bellamy was voiced by Jeremy Piven - he's quite a world away from his usual Entourage. Hugh Grant isn't his usual plummy self in The Pirates! which I glad for but, in all honesty, none of the voice acting really stands out. If a sequel were to be made I'm sure they could easily replace the cast and no-one would really care or notice.

The Pirates! is definitely not a scratch on Aardman's greatest feat Wallace and Gromit: The Wrong Trousers but that's not to say that it's not enjoyable in it's own right. It totally plays to the current children film tatic of jokes for both the kids and adults. The grown-ups will dig the scientific references whilst the children will no doubt lap up the silly shenanigans of the crew. It may not be the sharpest cutlass in the galley but it's defintely got a lot of shine to it - and that's enough for me to admire it.